[ UBUUROI ]

The seaside sunlight splashed across your face as the wind picked up the scent of the salty crests of waves just offshore. The rays of the mid-morning sun were comforting and dazing. It put you in a stupor: you stood in the middle of the street, taking it all in. Paradise. This was paradise.

Hey! Bozo! A voice struck you and broke you free from our trance. You're blocking the road. A Lupe (...well, it kind of looked like a Lupe anyway,) across the street pointed to a pair of fruit carts lead by Unis. They impatiently grumbled through their bits at you as you leaped aside to let them pass.

Sorry, sorry, you apologized quietly, embarrassed by your momentary stupidity.

The Lupe chuckled and shook his head in amusement. Nice going, that Spotted Uni was ready to give you a good kick. He leaned on the lower half of his split doorway and turned to face the breeze. The Lupe took in a big whiff of the famously fresh Altador air. He sighed. You here on vacation?

Scratching your head sheepishly, you responded, Yeah, sorta. I kind of wanted to see how things were going at the Hall of Heroes but I got a little sidetracked. You looked at the Lupe. He looked kind of familiar, but he definitely had one of those faces you could never forget. Wide-set eyes, deep in their sockets, a heavy brow to cover them nearly completely. Unlike most Lupes though his ears didn't stand up; they folded over like two little, fluffy Cybunny tails. You tried to imagine what they might have looked like if they didn't flop over but the image that came to mind was so profound you had to hold back a laugh.

Yeah, you look like a tourist. Come on in, the Lupe said. His baggy jowls pulled back into something that resembled a smile. Why don't we see if we can get you on the right track, I know there are some Shenkuuian airboats that could take you 'round to the other bay. He opened the lower half of the door for you. Inside the stucco building was nearly empty, but you could see a small door leading out the back, possibly to another part of the house. You muttered a word of thanks as you stepped past him inside. By the way, he said with a grin as he shut both doors behind him, sealing the two of you inside the near-darkness, my name's Ubu.

...Oh, sweet Fyora. Him?

the ghastly lupe

You thought he looked familiar. That name rings a bell, something about him and some small brown... weasel of some sort. You might have read his name in The Neopian Times at some point. At any rate, it didn't matter where you recognized him from. What mattered was that he was notoriously grouchy and seldom kept any company! Warily you followed him out into an atrium. The bright blue sky above was blinding after having just come out of the dark entryway.

Excuse me, you said quietly as the Lupe ducked into another room, but I don't really think-

He returned immediately with a small pamphlet, a map, and... a smile? Here you are, he said in his raspy voice. He handed you the pamphlet. It was for the local Shenkuu Airboat port. He opened up the map of the island you were currently on and pointed to the northwest side. See, here's where we are. I can call you a cabbie but I won't pay him for you. You've got NP?

You were hardly listening. In the room across from where you had come out of, you could see the unmistakable glint of gold. Ubuuroi cleared his throat. You absentmindedly started, I, yeah... What? He furrowed his brow at your disrespect.

Hey bucko, you gonna accept my help or what? Do you even know who I am?

info here.

to the gallery

This is my own personal gallery. You see, I collect artifacts and keep them here in my home on display for my most important house guests. You know, counts, dukes, scholars and the like. If you want to keep all of your fingers I suggest you don't touch anything.

3,500,000 NP	Ah, the Teco di Altador, or more commonly known as the Techo Statue. If you can believe it, this is the original sculpture, not just a copy! No one is sure what she was originally doing with her arms, but some scholars believe she was spinning wool, a common household chore.
400,000 NP	The Golden Peophin Urn is an ancient piece originally found in the ruins of Qasala before the curse was lifted. No one is sure who the two Peophins featured on the urn are because, unlike normal gold, black, or red-figure pottery, they are not labeled.
270,000 NP	The Golden Coltzan Statue is the oldest piece in my collection, dating back to 2100 BN. Coltzan had a private treasury hidden in the dunes of the Lost Desert. This was just one of hundreds of magnificent artifacts found there.
12,000,000 NP	Ah, the Twin Faerie Blades! This beautiful pair is just one of a handful in Neopia. Queen Fyora fashioned them herself and is currently selling them in her Hidden Tower, but for a hefty price. Just look at that beautiful niello and gold inlay.
2,500,000 NP	Don't breathe on that! That is my copy of the Anubis Toxicology Reports (Abridged). After Sakhmet was saved and Qasala restored to its original, pristine state, this was given out as a reward. Can you believe it! That foolosh Orange Yurble was just giving this away! (For the right amount of plot points, of course.) Needless to say, this will be worth a lot more than it is now in several decades.

portraits

Thank you April!

handsome toys

These adorable objects were gifts from past visitors. They're called 'adoptables', though I'm not sure why. They are most certainly not up for adoption. You see the resemblance, don't you? Yes, they're quite cute. Do you have one for me to add to my collection?

return some day...

Well, I suppose that concludes our tour. You know, ...uh, You, you're not so bad. Maybe a little dimwitted but nothing to worry about. Not everyone is blessed with street smarts, you know.

I actually had a rather nice time. You see, I'm working on relaxing. My family says it makes me 'nicer', though I don't know what they're talking about, I've always been nice. ...Don't give me that look! Alright, you've overstayed your welcome. Get outta here, bub!