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The Cheese Den
Do you want to see my cheese den?
This
picture was taken by my petpet when he was stuck to the ceiling. Are you wanting
to
know how I stucked him there? With melted cheese!
The cheese den is all yellow!
Hooraying! I filled it
with straw because I like straw very much. I like to tear it apart and
kick the little bits everywhere :) They look so pretty all over the
house! Buggy doesn't like my decorating though, she complains about having no vacuum
cleaners in Neopia.
The cheese den is not just a
room full of straw, oh no. If it was it would be called "the straw
den" or something else equally stoopid. As it is this room also contains my hoard of
cheese. You can't see
the cheeses because they are hiding under the straw. If you're hungry just dig over
*there* and you'll probably find a cheese omelette or two.
In my room you'll also find...
Colby Jack is not cheese. He's my petpet.
Colby Jack likes cheese just as much as I do. But he isn't having teeth in his
head and cannot chew cheeses. That is good because then he cannot be eating all
my cheesiness unexpectedly. When he acts good I cut it up into little cubes and feed
it to him. Colby Jack says *quack* and then I am knowing that he wants a swim.
Well, he doesn't get one because I don't have a pool. At night he sleeps in the
straw among the cheese... but he's not a cheese and I painted him red to make sure that no one would be thinking he
is. And so that I wouldn't forget and accidentally bite him. Ooooo... I sure do
feel like biting something right now...
Biting
I want to bite you!
I want to bite you!
I want to bite you!
*ahem*
Sorry about that.
I just... I just like to be biting things... and neopets... and people... and
you!
*bite* *bite* *bite* *bite*
Colby Jack! Stop biting this nice visitor! Excuse me... 
No, Jack, we can't bite them now... Buggy said if we bite anyone except in the battledome we have to live outside in a cardboard box and guard the neohome. I don't want to live outside... It's cold and windy!
So, do you need a bandaid?
Oh, good. See... it's a good thing Jack doesn't have teeth... no harm done.
And... you wouldn't be telling Buggy about this, would you? No, or course you
wouldn't. Here, have some cheesy goodness, you'll feel better.
A Story
Do
you want to hear a story? Okay, I will be telling you the story of BOB.
Once upon a time there was a hamster named BOB, and he was friends with a penguin named BOB. BOB the hamster had never seen snow, so BOB took him to his house in the mountains. As BOB stepped in the front door a giant net fell on him and BOB cackled gleefully.
I have caught you!" said BOB. "Now my garden can be complete!"
BOB put BOB in his freezer telling him to pose like Napoleon. BOB kept BOB there for 2 nights and when BOB took BOB out he was frozen solid.
BOB put BOB out in his snowy garden where there would be no chance of BOB thawing out and escaping. Now BOB's garden was perfectly decorated with a little hamster lawn gnome posed like Napoleon. The Penguin Club voted it best garden of the year.
My Garden
Speaking of gardening, I think you've seen enough of the inside of the cheese den. Let me take you to see my garden. I'm sure you'll like it...
Look at the cute little gnome! Hmm... he doesn't look like he's seated very comferly on that shroom. See those dwarf trees? I planted them when they were just
itty bitty saplings and I had four of them. But then I bit one of them so... erm...
I think three is enough. There's more garden space around the neohome but it's
filled with fire bushes to keep the house warm. No, I didn't put them there to
burn the house down. We're in Terror Mountain, didn't
you notice? Idiot..
I love living on Terror Mountain because I get to go
sledding! And there are heaps of wimpy little poogles everywhere that I can beat
up!
I Hate Poogles
Poogles
are evil! They are dopey and lumpy and useless and their ugly tails look like
they're shooting out a big brown flushable! Except they can't get it to come all
the way out so they walk around like that leaving smelly trails in the snow! If
you let them into your home it will stink for weeks! I hate poogles! If I see a
poogle I will certainly bite it! Living outside is worth it just to be sinking in my teeth
into bum-faced poogle flesh. 
A Gift For You
Let's see... I think I buried it near my rubber plant... just let me dig it up...
Aaahh... here he is. Meet Crispin!
Buggy nearly sold him when she was cleaning out the safety deposit box. I...
"stole" him from her. That's why he has to stay buried until I can
find him somewhere else to live. Do you think he could stay with you, guest?
Diggory
Over here, under a pair of yolkalias lives another of my plant friends: Diggory
the Gnome Shroom. Buggy won him in a contest in the Lawn
Gnomes and Cheese guild. His description reads:This shroom is said
to be magical and at the right time of day turn into a gnome for a little bit,
but no one has proved it true yet." I haven't noticed him turn into a
gnome but I can't wait! Maybe he'll be wearing a hat... or even have a fishing
rod! And no, you can't have Diggory! If you lay a hand on him I will bite you so
hard... and Buggy won't be angry when I tell her what you tried to do. She
loves Diggory just as much as I do. She's convinced there must be some way to
get him to become a gnome. She tried taking him to the fungus caves, thinking
that the fungus that turns a krawk petpet into a krawk neopet might have the
power to make him a real live gnome. Well, that didn't work but anyway Diggory
is my friend whether he has arms or not.
Buggy
(crazyballis)
On my profile it says that Buggy is my owner. Hmmph, I don't know about that but
she is feeding me and playing with me and giving me weapons. She builded my
neohome and and my neogarden. She joined neopets in February 2000 but didn't
create me or even start playing neopets until about a year later, what a
lazy bum. She likes cheese too, but only rennet-free cheese because she's a
vegetarian and rennet comes from the stomachs of little baby cows.
I fought Dragonysy in the battledome and it was a good fight. Now we like
to share battle tips and experiences and such. She's really cool she looks like
beautiful golden cheese. Dragonysy has a dungeon at
the foot of the Tyrannian volcano. You really should go and visit her.
Sarah
MacDonald
(gelertpup_cybunny272)
Once day Buggy got a neofriend request and a
neomail that said: "I am a neo person who will give you cheese".
Intrigued, Buggy wrote back and found out that Sarah is liking cheese just about
as much as I do, ecspecially macaroni and cheese and cheddar cheese and
parmesan cheese and a cheese calzone and pizza with cheese and cheese
sandwiches. She also is liking pepper jack cheese and nachos with melted cheese and
she likes cheese on her baked potato and she like to eat cheese plain. As well
she is liking cheese sticks, mozzeralla sticks, mozzeralla cheese, white cheeder cheese, mixes of cheese...
etcetera etcetera...
Wow! That's a lot of cheese! She even gave us some
cheeses and pizza and other foods. Yum! If I wasn't living with Buggy I would
definately want to live with Sarah.
Hegehog was Buggy's first pet, so she treats him better than me. Well, he
doesn't have his own page yet so I'm not jealous. No, really I swear I'm not!
Hedgehog is like an older brother to me. A really older brother... Hedgehog has
been painted many different colours but he's settled with pirate because it
suits his hobby: collecting sea pineapples. Last time he checked he had 476 0_o
Buggy single-handedly raised their price 5000† np while buying them.
Now come back inside
the cheese den so I can let you see some of my favourite things that Buggy has
founded and boughted for me.
Things I don't like
Not all items are
good, some are being very evil, as evil as poogles! And that is not a rotten
omelette, it is a cheesey omelette. My love for cheese does not extend to any
item that is including egg!
Treasures
Do you want to see some more decoratings I have found? Just taking a looky in the toy box. I promise there are no monster in there...
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Treasures For You
From Me
I would like to be giving out little cybunnies for you to remember me by, and so I will. You may take one or two to live on your pets page or maybe somewhere else. Just remember that you must be linking them back to me to prevent the mysterious overnight disappearance of your head.
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Below is the code for one of these bunnies, just replace "COLOUR" with the colour you want.
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Another Story
I
have another story to be telling you... It is about cheese. Do you want
to know it? Listen:
Once upon a land in a time far away there was an old man with a beard living in a cave. He was a hermit and he stayed alive by eating cave-moss and moles. In winter, when the cave-moss was sparse and the moles buried way underground, he would eat bits of the huge beard he had grown during fairer weather. He was not happy living like this, no siree bob.
One the morning of Ocnember the 2nd he left his cave for the first time in 10 years. Stepping out into the cold sunshine he surveyed the area. There was another cave right next to his! And it was filled with... dun dun dun... Head-Explody Cheese! To the old man it looked just like any other cheese, so he thought it was good food. But it was not. He took a bite and as he swallowed his head exploded with a *pop*. :o
At the sound of this a million moles crawled out of their hibernation holes in the cheese. They stripped the man of everything but his flesh and bones, and used his beard hair to line their mushroom nests. By summer, the mushrooms had hatched into new moles, and all the old moles had evolved into cheese. The cycle of life continues...
Hit Points : 77/44
Strength : 43
Defense : 43
Movement : 20
Height : 21 cm
Weight : 25 lb
I'm not that strong, but I'm doing pretty good in the
battledome. Out of 233 matches I've won 196. That means I've only
lost 26 matches and drawn 11. And my score is 11903. Yay! My
goal is to win 300† battles and I'm well on my way.
I don't know what to say about myself so I'm going to let Buggy speak to you. Just let me yell to herBuuuuuugg-yyy! I'm going to go and make some cheese cake while she talks to you. And you can't have any cheesecake if you tell her about the biting...
Buggy: Hi
guest! It's good to see you. Snowball has been well behaved, has she? That's
good. Sometimes I worry about her. She's a... biter, y'know? And now that
she's become mutant... well... let's just say her teeth have gotten a lot
sharper. She used to be Christmas coloured but that was dangerous because she
looked so cute and people wanted to pet her... big mistake. I hope her umm...
dark appearance serves as a warning to everyone. And of course she looks blood
cool in the battledome when she releases the hand painted scarab :)
I've had
Snowball for 63404 hours and every day she continues to surprise me. Her
insanity is both a burden and a gift. She's so... energetic and fun to be with.
And she trains so hard... Of course only the faeries and kitchen quests can
actually raise her stats. She can never go back to the Mystery Island training school
because she bit The Techo Master. And she knows where Cap'n Threelegs' fourth
leg is... if you know what I mean. Even so I would never ever make her
live outside in the snow or the fire bushes. That's just an idle threat to stop
her causing any permanent damage. Oh, look, she's coming back. I'll let her
serve you some of her delicious cheese cake. It's made with real cheese, yum!
Snowball:
Here's the cheese cake! Lets all dig in! Once we've finished you can go and
see other places... Well, good eating!
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Do you like CHEESE?! How about lawn gnomes? Or Bob or hamsters or HOBOS or other insane stuff?
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Bye-ee!
Well, that seems to be everything. I hope you're
satisfied! Fare thee well!
*Colby Jack says "quack"*
*sniff* I'm going to be missing you...
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