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How To Be Miserable

by salutation


The saddest day of the year is upon us, are you going to embrace the holiday or avoid it? The one day of the year where it is acceptable to walk around with a sad look on your face. The one day of the year where all Grey coloured pets feel like they are appreciated for once. You guessed it, today we are celebrating Grey Day! Some cheerful Neopians decide to avoid this holiday like NeoPox, because it simply just isn’t their aesthetic, however, some less eager Neopians like myself, love and embrace the tradition of Grey Day. If you are one of these people, here are some tips on how to truly be miserable this Grey Day.

1) Pay a visit to Baelia, the Grey Faerie. This holiday truly embodies her spirit, which is usually gloomy. Many people use this day as a way to appreciate the Grey Faerie and her being released from her entrapment. Word is that she is always looking for Neopians to share her sadness with. What better way to celebrate the saddest day of the year than to spend it with our resident gloomy Grey Faerie? Although sad and powerless, Baelia is a very kind hearted faerie, and could always use another faerie’s powers to bless your Neopet on this day. Maybe you could pay her a kind visit on her special day to help her get some new wings. Surprisingly, kindness isn’t uncommon on Grey Day, although I’m not sure why, if you follow these tips it is doubtful that you will want to be exceptionally kind.

2) Dress for the occasion. Want to feel as miserable as a rainy day with grey skies in Faerieland? Consider dressing yourself and your pets in grey clothes. If you want to embrace your inner Baelia, you can purchase a Grey Faerie Dress and Grey Faerie Wings, then you will look as sad as the original Grey Faerie herself, so you definitely cannot go wrong. You could also wear some Bloodshot Eye Contacts so it looks as though you have been crying, which is a perfect look to show off on Grey Day! Alternatively, you can pull out last year’s Halloween costume to scare people, and make everyone else have a miserable Grey Day. You could also channel a gothic look this Grey Day, as some Neopians find that almost as gloomy as wearing Grey clothes. Some people find it appropriate to wear their least favourite clothes on Grey Day, clothes which make you feel uncomfortable, or maybe you own a t shirt with something you dislike on it. For example, wearing an I Love Mince Pies T-Shirt if you hate mince pies would be appropriate for Grey Day.

3) Do not go anywhere sunny or bright. Avoid the Lost Desert, avoid Altador and Meridell or even Neopia Central. Anywhere that might have a high temperature or make you smile on this gloomy day. If you can avoid it at all, do not go outside. Unless you’re visiting Baelia.. You might be able to get away with visiting the Virtupets Space Station, I don’t hear many nice things about Dr Sloth around this time of year. The smells and sights in Neopia Central are too tempting. Can you really walk past the chocolate factory or Hubert’s hotdogs and smell these delicious foods without being happy, or wanting to taste some? If you answered no to that, definitely avoid your regular day shopping and walking around in Neopia Central. Stay in today with your Neopets, maybe read a book about the tragic state of Neopia two thousand years ago, when it was full of thick, poisonous smog. Or a book about Dr Sloth, that works too.

4) Eat sad food. Now you’re probably thinking, what consists of sad food? I’m sure most of you haven’t actually thought about it before, but there are many different types of miserable foods around Neopia, which would be perfect to eat on this sad occasion. One option is Grey Cheese. I’m sure many of you love cheese, and eating this might put you right off it, which is perfect for today. Another sad food is Grey Eggs and Bacon which even make a sad face, so will definitely feel miserable while you eat them. Additionally, there is Burnt Hot Dog, Rotten Negg and Onion Quesadilla, Grey Ice Cream and Moldy Pancakes. However, if you don’t want to be turned against your favourite foods for life, maybe only pick one or two to eat today.

Pictured below are all of the sad foods that were mentioned above, so that you can easily recognise them while doing your Grey Day shop.

5) Invite your Neofriends over. What’s a better way to celebrate Grey Day than being inside your Neohome alone, with your grey pets? With your miserable Neofriends and their grey pets too! Grey Day doesn’t have to be all about loneliness, if your friends are celebrating the occasion, you don’t need to be sad alone, as you can invite them over and eat sad food together! Trust me, it is a better alternative. Although I warn you that inviting your Neofriends over might cause a tiny spark of happiness if you end up talking about rainbows and eating pizza or Hubert’s hot dogs. If you want to truly celebrate this holiday with them, you have to hang out with them in the sad way, and use the tips above. Do not go outside with your Neofriends, do not talk about how kind the Soup Faerie is. If you are really struggling at being miserable with your friends, good conversation topics consist of things such as: ‘my Skeith ate his favourite toy’, ‘all I got was a Box of Trifle Mix AGAIN from Tombola today’, ‘it’s currently raining in Mystery Island’, ‘my team hasn’t won the Altador Cup in years’ or ‘I lost 100,000 Neopoints today at the Wheel of Extravagance’. Any of these conversation starters are bound to put you and your Neofriends in a bad mood, perfectly fitting the occasion. Alternatively, you can whine about anything or everything else, just as long as you aren’t talking about anything pleasant.

So, there you have it! Five tips on how to be miserable this Grey Day. If you are celebrating today, remember that it is only one day of the year, and that tomorrow you can go back to playing with your Usukis and walking through Brightvale in the sunshine!

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