The 5 Most Annoying Background Game Characters
Okay, I know that you all had busy schedules recently thanks to the Altador Cup. There were Yooyuballs to score, slushies to sling and some epic urge to make more noise than that blue Techo. But now you can find SOME amount of time out from the surge of adrenaline and excitement to do some (dare I say it) reading.
Because here's the thing. The Altador Cup only lasts one month of the entire year. That leaves another eleven months for us to try and gain those precious Neopoints by going to the games room. And we all know that each of us have our own set of favorites that we go to, be it for entertainment, the NP or maybe because we'd rather spend so much time trying to get onto the High Scoreboard that we forget to feed our Neopets for a week (my Uni still hasn't forgiven me for that).
But sometimes you will find a game in the games room that even though it may have been the best game in the history of Neopia, there is someone (or something) that will irritate you so much that not only will your Neopets start trying to strap a straight-jacket onto you, but you also end up making it your life goal to NEVER PLAY THAT GAME EVER AGAIN! (See, I put caps lock on just to express my complete detestation for these characters in these games).
So the following are in my opinion probably the top five most annoying Background Characters in any Neopian game I could think of, and indeed I don't play any of these certain games anymore because of them (well, except one, but we'll get to that).
1. Yooyuball - The Darigan Yooyuball
Since it IS that time of year where everyone tries to back a certain team to win that much envied Altador Cup, I had to include SOMETHING to do with Yooyuball. Now I know what you are all thinking (because I am just psychic when it comes to these things) 'But mr_holithon! you just said that you'll never play any of these games EVER AGAIN! Does that mean you don't compete in the Altador Cup?'
On the contrary, I most certainly do play Yooyuball at every chance I get, especially as I am supporting a team that needs all the help it can get (Moltara For The Win! Or at least not last for once). But it is because I have to play this game to compete that makes the Darigan Yooyuball all that more annoying of a background character. Yes, it can be argued that a Yooyuball is actually the main character of a game call Yooyuball, but I have decided to call the Darigan Yooyuball a background character as you in fact control the members of your team, not the yooyuballs themselves. Now that that's been settled, allow me to continue.
We all know that the point of the game is to gain as many points as possible in three minutes by throwing the yooyuballs into the opposing goal. And that's where the Darigan Yooyuball comes in. Usually in a game I will get an average of about nine goals per game, which is about one goal every twenty seconds.
But as soon as the Darigan Yooyuball comes into play, due to it going in any unknown direction when thrown, no goal will be scored for two minutes of the game. The Darigan Yooyuball just does what it like and doesn't take anything from nobody. Then when the point is finally scored, when we are about to think that we will never have to go through that for the remainder of the game, in comes another Darigan Yooyuball.
And I know that I'm not alone in this. In fact, I asked five different threads of the NeoBoards asking what the most painful yooyuball to use was in the game, and all five of them agreed that the Darigan Yooyuball was their least favorite.
But at least this game only occurs for one month every year. I sadly can't say the same for...
2. Web of Vernax - Mutant Red Spyder
In this game you play as a Black Spyder (the color is important) who tries to catch an unusual amount of Vernax in its web by making squares around them (I really don't get how that would physically work but this is Neopia after all). Now this game makes each level more difficult than the last by adding one extra petpetpet at a time, as when a Vernax runs into you while you are making a new thread, you lose a life. After a while you eventually get the hang of trapping the Vernax after each level. That is, until you reach Level 6 and one certain menacing petpet enters the fray.
The Mutant Red Spyder as the Neopian staff call him has the ability of eating away any threads your Spyder had previously made which is annoying enough when you see your handiwork slowly disappear before your eyes. But what gets this background character to go from slightly annoying to impossibly painful is just one little factor: it is INSANELY FAST (oops the Caps Lock came back, sorry about that). This Red Spyder dosn't just eat your web away, but he also does it in less than 3 seconds. This pretty much makes it near impossible to get beyond Level 6.
Despite the fact that you can indeed defeat this dangerous foe by forcing it into a dead end on your web, I pretty much blame this background character for my now deep fear of Spyders (which my Meepit enemies know to well).
And speaking of near impossible games...
3. Kass Basher - The Flagpole
Okay, it is clear that I am going to have to explain this one. In Kass Basher, you must use either a stick, a bread stick or a club (which is pretty much just a big stick) and the wind to whack a plushie of Lord Kass as far as possible and you gain more points the further it goes. And strangely enough this extremely simple game is the most popular game in the Games Room.
To determine the speed of the wind, a small flag on a flag pole has been placed to tell you how fast the wind is going and which direction it is going. And can I just say it is hilarious hitting the Kass doll when the wind speed is -9 meters!
Now any professional Kass Basher can tell you is that if you want any chance of getting the doll as far as possible to get those higher scores, the flagpole must be showing the wind going at +9 meters. And here is where the annoying part kicks in. The amount of time you have to wait for that tiny little flag to reach 9 meters is a greater test of patience than watching a Slorg race from start to finish whilst waiting for the paint on your NeoHome to dry.
Let me explain to you how I think the flagpole is thinking (if a pole somehow learnt how to create thought). It thinks that it will stick around the four-to-five meter mark for about a minute, then very slowly raise up to the eight meter mark just to give you hopes up. Then just as you think that desire 9 meters is in out grasp, the flag changes its mind and flies all the way down to the minuses range and stay there until you give up.
I know it thinks this as this has happened to me endless times over the space of half an hour, and I not once saw the 9 meter mark. And so I can gladly say I will never whack defenseless plushies ever again (somewhere a certain blue grundo plushie is breathing a sigh of relief).
Speaking of inanimate objects mocking me...
4. Meerca Chase II - Red Neggs AND Fish Neggs
Ranking as number two on the most popular games in Neopia, it stands to reason that the Red Neggs of Meerca Chase II are among the most irritating obstacles in any game, especially when the point of said game is to collect as many non-Red Neggs as possible as your tail slowly gets bigger.
But the Red Neggs aren't the only annoying background character of this game. They are merely the pawns used by their king. The real menace behind my irritation in this game are those dastardly rare Fish Neggs. Well, at least as the highest scoring neggs in the game they should be rare. However, it seems that whenever I play this game, the same thing happens every time.
It starts with just the usual collecting of Yellow Neggs which results with the increasing amount of Red Neggs that clot up the field, making the game harder as you go along. Then finally you find yourself surrounded by Red Neggs while collecting one particularly annoying Yellow Negg. Once that Negg has been collected and you have accepted your fate, you see it. A Fish Negg. However, this moment of joy is destroyed moments later as the Game Over screen appears.
And like the flag in Kass Basher before, this happens not once but rather frequently. It starts to make you think that Fish Neggs aren't as rare as the game suggests they are.
But in all these occasions, the annoying Background character has some sore of purpose. I really can't say the same for...
5. Dice-a-Roo - Blumaroo Passers-by
You know that moment when you are trying to study for an important class test, or you are trying to get as many points you can for the Altador Cup, but your little brother or sister or cat decides the best thing to do with their time is to continuously poke at you until you give up what you're doing? Think of how that made you feel. Then multiply that by a thousand and fifty seven. That is how I would describe my feelings towards the Blumaroos that decide to talk to you during Dice-a-Roo.
You at first think they are going to be telling you something useful to help you in the game...
"I think you can win faeries from this game. :)"
...but then their comments start going off topic, from talking about something else about the site...
"Have you got a homepage for your Neopet yet???"
...or some self advertising...
"A Blumaroo is a fun, clean pet, so adopt one today!"
...to something depressing...
"My tail hurts!"
"Please stop the Moncerous from eating all my friends. :("
...or just downright random and pointless...
"This job is so much better than being a bingo ball."
...until you just...
"So, have YOU adopted a Blumaroo yet?"
"Blumaroos love Nachos. I bet you didn't know that!"
"Tra La La!"
Take the money! Take the money!"
It was at this point I had thrown myself out the window of Roo Castle. So now you know why I have been writing this article from a NeoHospital bed. As a warning for those who may enter these games to be prepared for the worst. But then I guess without these irritating background characters, the Neopian Staff wouldn't be able to release all the incredible things that come out of the world of Neopia.
By the way I won't be out of NeoHospital until the end of the month, as I need to heal all fifty broken bones in my body, so please send my Neopian Times to my ward so I can keep up with the Altador Cup.
Do you disagree with something in my list? Can a flagpole really be count as a "character"? Send feedback, I love it!