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The Phantom Stylists


by olim333

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I could smell something that smelt like steam and a hair dressing salon coming from my Cybunny’s room. I burst in and found her straightening Spike, my baby Tonu’s mane while he was playing with his teddy bear.

     “SAKURA, WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING?!” I screamed at my Cybunny.

     She looked up innocently while Spike babbled something in baby language.

     “I was just straightening Spike’s hair. He has a lot of split ends and could use some root booster...”

     “BUT HE’S A TINY LITTLE BABY!” I protested picking Spike up quickly.

     Sakura looked annoyed.

     “Aww, but I was just making him fashionable,” she whined.

     “Being fashionable is really the least of Spike’s worries. Now, young lady, you can go back to giving hair ‘styles’ to your Usuki dolls!”

     I closed her door and walked out of the room. Spike drooled on my shoulder. I sighed and gave him a dummy then put him in his cot.

     ***

     “OH MY- WHAT'S HAPPENED TO MY HAIR?!” I woke up to my Xweetok, Princess, shrieking fiercely in the morning. Someone had gelled her hair into an extravagant style. She was desperately trying to back comb it into its usual style, but the comb just bounced off.

     “Ugh, it’s like someone has put super glue in this hair gel!” she sobbed.

     I went over to help her. I had a strong feeling that Sakura had styled her hair while she slept.

     I marched into Sakura’s room, startling her Ghostkerchief, who started shrieking and wailing.

     “Be quiet, Boo,” Sakura mumbled to him, still half asleep.

     I grabbed her arm and dragged her out of bed and into Princess’ room. Klestellia, my Poogle, was trying to comb Princess’ hair also but it just didn’t work.

     Sakura stared at Princess blankly until she screeched out:

     “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY HAIR?! IT’S RUINED! I CAN’T GO OUTSIDE LIKE THIS!!!”

     “What do you mean?” Sakura asked innocently. “Why would I do your hair like that? You know I could do better. Who ever did that has no idea about hair styles.”

     Spike started bawling so I went into his room.

     “SPIKE!” I yelled out in horror.

     Someone or something had gelled his soft blue mane into spikes that looked like they belonged in the Twisted Roses.

     He touched his hair with his little paw.

     “Ouchie,” he squealed. His large green eyes welled with tears.

     I picked him up and rushed to the bathroom. I got out the shampoo, put him in the bath tub and started washing his mane while he had an epic battle with his rubber duck.

     When I was finally done, Spike’s little mane was all nice and shaggy again. He was happy and I put him into his cot for a nap.

     Klestellia and Sakura had finally washed the gel out of Princess’ hair and they’d all gone for a walk somewhere. I sat in my arm chair and fell asleep.

     I screamed when I woke up. Someone had teased my hair into an afro. This was getting way too weird.

     “Ok, this is getting out of control,” I announced as I walked back into the dining room. My four pets burst out laughing at my new hair style.

     I scowled. “Klestellia,” I said

     “Yes,” she snickered, accidentally flashing her sharp teeth as she laughed.

     “Get me a can of neocola and a baseball bat. I’m catching this midnight barber tonight.” And with that I stomped into the bathroom to fix my ruined hair.

     ********

     At 8:00pm I sat in the chair near the door. In my hand I held a brand new baseball bat and a can of neocola (not the caffeine free one; I needed to stay awake).

     Spike was asleep, Klestellia was playing cards with Princess, and Sakura was giving herself a manicure quietly in her room. When they had all gone to bed, I took my first sip of neocola. The bubbles fizzed in my mouth and I immediately felt more awake and eager to catch the phantom hairdresser.

     The hours passed and I was on my sixteenth can of neocola. My teeth were probably completely dissolved by now, but I didn’t care about anything as long as I caught the bandit.

     I grew more and more tired until I heard a crash. My eyes flew open and my heart rate dramatically increased. My fingers tightened around the grip of the baseball bat. I looked out the window. The night was as black as velvet. I slowly opened the door. I saw a shadow sneak around the corner. I charged quietly after it. It was small and very fast. I saw it bounce up into a tree. And then it happened. I was completely covered in meepits.

     Sounds pretty random, I know, but the small shadow I was chasing was the leader meepit. Now its whole army clung to my arms and stared into my soul with their large dark eyes, trying to style my hair. I screamed. Klestellia heard and dived through the window, breaking all the glass. She bared her razor sharp fangs and growled viciously. The meepits glared at her and growled back. They all possessed a pair of scissors, a hair brush and some gel. This was a face off between a sweet, yellow Poogle and an army of disturbed and insane meepits. They all lunged for Klestellia, but she was very fast. She dodged out of the way swiftly right as they were about to give her a Mohawk.

     “Get a cage!” I yelled out.

     Sakura must have heard, because in an instant she was stumbling out the front door with a rather large cage. Princess followed in full battle mode, along with Spike. But I didn’t notice Spike. He found a meepit and wanted to play with it. He just loved petpets, especially his Faellie. But meepits don’t classify as petpets. They’re monsters. And this one went to bite Spike right on his little nose, but right as it almost made contact with his soft blue skin, he rolled onto his back and kicked it away. I watched in wonder. Spike kicked another meepit away as it tried to plait his mane. He cleared about five more evil stylists by rolling into them. Scissors and tubs of hair gel went flying through the air. While the meepits were still dazed, I shoved them into the cage. When we finished off all 57 of them, it was morning. I looked like I had been living in a cave my whole life and my pets looked like they’d just taken a bath in saliva. Spike was asleep, so I picked him up and walked to our house. I bathed him, and my other pets all had a shower and got all nice and cleaned up. We slept most of the day. When I finally woke up, I felt like my limbs were about to fall off and run away. It had been very tiring battling so many meepits. So tiring in fact that I barely even noticed the meepit sitting in Spike’s cot, but this time it wasn’t cutting Spike’s hair; Spike was cutting its. It had taught him. Never the less, I picked the nasty little critter up and put it in the cage. “No more doing hair, Spike,” I warned him.

      “Oooohkaaa,” he replied and rolled onto his back.

      “What are we going to do with all the meepits?” asked Klestellia.

     “I have a good idea,” replied Princess. “We’ll send them to the Cybunny at the Haunted Woods.”

     The next day we travelled to the Haunted Woods. I dragged the large cage of squirming meepits up to the Cybunny who immediately looked surprised. “10000 NP and they’re yours,” I told her. She paid me.

     “They also can style hair.”

     “What?” the Cybunny asked, looking surprised.

     But we were already gone.

The End

 
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