The Jhudora Day Bunny
It was the morning of 4th day of Awakening, Y10 and all was relatively quiet on the Neopets Premium Charter Board. There was the usual early morning traffic; threads about price checks and guide requests, adverts for mall openings, announcements of new guilds and, of course, plaintive pleas for urgent help with Faerie Quests (because we all know that those Über Faeries are martyrs to their poor mental stamina and concentration; they could really could lose their heads if they weren’t firmly attached to their shoulders with glitter and bubble gum).
However, amidst the blissful and carefully maintained status quo of this bright and glistening Charter morning (because all Charter mornings are bright, glistening, and full to bursting with glorious chocolate muffin-ish glee but, uh-oh those Charter nights - uh well-a well-a well-a huh...) something was stirring; something strange, something wicked, something... purple and green and – fluffy? Eh?
Earlier that day...
Quite happy to frolic around the site, administering to her Neopets and seeing to her dailies, a certain beta-carotene addicted Neopian’s carrot-radar started to bleep fiercely. It took a few moments for her to register what had caused this phenomenon but, once she had scanned the room, she saw it. Floating in mid air, just out of her reach, there had materialized the strangest vegetable she had ever seen (and let’s face it, considering this adventure takes place in Neopia then by measure, it must have been really, really odd indeed). Wondering if she had had one too many glasses of sparkling spring water with her porridge that morning, she blinked a couple of times to make sure she was seeing what she thought she was seeing. Sure enough, suspended in its own modest aura of vegetable charm was a medium-sized, slightly knobbly, purple and green carrot.
Immediately she considered that the ever-innovative Neopets Team had, once more, produced an unusual and captivating hybrid and resolved to lay claim to this marvelous example of vegetable breeding and development. She intended to place it in her repository of all things carroty: The Carrot Museum, Neopia’s leading collection of every conceivable item related to the noble carrot. Unfortunately, this particular Neopian is not blessed with the leggy stretch of a Lenny and so she was forced to pile a considerable number of somewhat uncooperative Meepits, one on top of each other (à la Wicked Wocky Wobble or Warf Rescue Team – neither of which she is very good at, so this was a truly reckless act) and then use them as a kind of squishy, pink, gnashing climbing frame. All this, to be able to reach what she was now absolutely certain was some amazing new kind of carrot.
It was then that she did an extremely silly thing. Yes, even more ridiculous than ascending a perilously unstable (both physically and behaviorally) Meepit pyramid to take hold of an obviously suspect object that was also almost certainly magical in origin and quite possibly dangerous. Nevertheless, atop her Meepit mountain, stretching on her tippy-toes, she just managed to reach the curious root and, as if she had taken leave of her senses completely, she decided that it really wouldn’t hurt any if she were to have a little try. Just a little nibble; not enough to spoil a potential Carrot Museum exhibit. Just a taste, that was all. Just – a – ta...
There was an almighty commotion as the ‘not so carefully as they could have been’ arranged Meepits, startled by the sudden hiss and rumble of an enormous purple and green flash, began to lose their balance and list dangerously sideways. Meeping loudly and gnashing their spiny teeth in fury, they toppled over, depositing their cargo of carrot-snatcher extraordinaire onto the unyielding floor with an unceremonious and resounding THUD! At that exact same moment, evidently affected by the properties of her supernatural snack, the carrot-snatcher’s flesh began to twist and turn hideously; in a manner not inconsistent with the effects experienced by some unfortunate Neopets after encountering some rather dodgy potions that are regularly distributed by another evil Neo-type, who has also been overly active recently. Coincidence? We think not. It took a few agonizing minutes for the full effect of biting into that hazardous crudité to become apparent but, once the clouds of putrid, purple smoke began to disperse, the clear and present horror of the moment was realized, ‘in glorious Neocolor’.
It was the scattered Meepits that first saw the fiendish creature and realized its abominable capacity to wreak havoc. Backing away slowly, their needle-sharp teeth bared in warning, the plainly unsettled Meepits looked for refuge (rather uncharacteristically for a breed of Petpet that has a reputation for being one hundred percent evil through and through) beneath any pillows, blankets or other padded article they could find. As they disbanded in terror, the object of their distress was clearly visible; crouching on the floor, with a rather bemused but nonetheless nefarious countenance, was a disheveled rabbit-type creature with steaming, matted purple fur and black leathery wings that draped themselves untidily across its knotted back. Balanced insanely on one of its snaggly front paws and almost, but not quite, masking the glint of some unnervingly large claws was a tattered wicker basket, from which emanated the most fetid stench anyone could ever possibly have imagined.
It was thus that the following announcement came to be displayed on the Neopets Premium Charter Board, that fateful morning of 4th day of Awakening, Y10; also known as – dun, dun, duuuuunn... Jhudora Day:
“The Jhudora Day Bunny: Having been enslaved by the charms of a magical purple and green carrot, this poor bewitched creature now skips gaily around Charter carrying a basket of slimy, dripping Jhudora Rotten Neggs...”
After a few hours had passed, each one of these foul fruits had come to rest and was nestling malevolently in the Item Event Logs of all manner of unsuspecting Neopians; thinly disguised as gifts, bubbling and seeping noxious gases (as one might expect), they lay in wait for their innocent recipients, promising to unleash who knows what terrors upon the delicate digestive systems of many a peckish Neopet. The lucky ones had owners who were either unable or unwilling to accept such a diabolical bequest and the offending items were returned, with a deservedly terse note from the Neopets Team explaining that they were neither accepted nor rejected within the forty-eight hour time limit and had, therefore, been ‘returned to sender’. Eventually, the immediately apparent effects of the toxic tuber wore off (lurid fur, scaly wings, maniacal stare etc.) but, there is no telling what kind of long term damage may have been done. Of course, Jhudora must have been at the bottom of this terrible incident and indeed, you should know that this is a cautionary tale; this episode is unlikely to be the last we hear of such unpleasant shenanigans.
Dear reader, beware. The Jhudora Day Bunny might very well reappear again next year and, in the meantime, another disquieting rumour has begun to circulate – that, come March, another vile and spiteful creature may be encountered, roaming the hallowed threads of the Premium Charter Board; the Illusen Day Kau.
The End (Maybe...)
Disclaimer: Absolutely no Meepits were harmed during the writing of this fantasy; conceptually or otherwise. Honest.
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