Where there's a Weewoo, there's a way Circulation: 185,678,020 Issue: 281 | 2nd day of Running, Y9
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Life as a Grand Bogen


by lassie_nikki

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Hello, I am Rufus the Kougra. I was asked to speak about a great tradition that I was once involved in, popularly known as Gadgadsbogen. Gadgadsbogen takes place throughout the entire Month of Running. However, what you may not know is that with every Gadgadsbogen festival, there is someone that plans it all. The technical name for this figure is the Grand Bogen. I was once honored by being asked to be the Grand Bogen and plan the celebrations. Now I’ll share with you the wonderful experience.

One particularly hot day, I was observing a Ghoti. You see, I collect petpets and I find these unique critters amazing! I love observing their sleeping/eating habits. I tend to blabber on and on about them so that people feel uncomfortable talking to me. However, none of that seemed to matter that day for at that moment, a group of wise island elders approached me. They insisted that I took the post of Grand Bogen for the upcoming carnival. Of course I accepted immediately! After all, I may never have gotten that chance again.

So for months and months I planned entertainment and most importantly, the wonderful foods and berries that would be given away at the event. By the time the month of Running came along, I was not only prepared but more than ready for the festival to be over with so I could relax! Ah, the gala was amazing. At the opening service, I was awarded with the Bogen headpiece and a lovely lei adorned my neck. The celebration was amazing. All the time used to prepare had paid off tremendously.

Now that you have the basic idea of how the festival went, I’ll explain to you what the specific duties are for the Grand Bogen.

1. Months in advance, the Grand Bogen must plan entertainment and arrange for food to be presented at the fair. When the time for the festival arrives, the Grand Bogen should feel confident that they have done everything in their power to organize the event so that it pleases the guests.

2. Grand Bogens must welcome the guests and see to it that they are happy at all times. Old legend notes that if any visitors are displeased, the fruits will sense gloom and not rise for the harvest. Even if a guest is rude or picky when it comes to the flavor of their fried Tigersquash, the Grand Bogen must remain calm and fetch their needs.

3. Grand Bogens are in charge of ensuring that no guests are served a drink that matches their outfit. It may sound silly, but to Islanders it is common knowledge that it is forbidden to have a cocktail that matches a hula skirt!

4. The least fun duty of the evening comes at the end. Once the festival is winding down, the Grand Bogen takes care of cleaning up the leftover litter of fruit rinds or drink cups. Not only would the guests be annoyed if there was trash remaining in the area, but the fruits would be most offended.

5. There is usually a competition at the very end of the celebration. Examples include Limbo Competitions, Name that Cooking Pot Recipe, or the Tiki Tour Cart Races. The Grand Bogen is in charge of planning this ending competition and making sure that there are instructors to help the guests since the Grand Bogen is usually cleaning up and arrives late to the competition.

6. After the competition, even if the cleaning is not finished, the Grand Bogen is responsible for saying farewell to all departing guests and thanking them for visiting the Gadgadsbogen party. This is common courtesy and will greatly satisfy the fruits.

7. The Grand Bogen makes a last-time round on the area to assure cleanliness and once he/she and the elders are content with the status of the grounds, the Grand Bogen may depart as well.

The greatest feeling a Grand Bogen can sense is the feeling that they fulfilled their duties! It is one form of honor to be offered the position as Grand Bogen, but it is another feeling to be successful in making YOUR Gadgadsbogen festival the best for years. The most a Grand Bogen can ask for is that the guests leave happily satisfied and respectful and that the fruits see how much Mystery Islanders appreciate them.

The experience is never forgettable, but I would have to say one of my favorite aspects of being Grand Bogen was the aftermath. After the festival, as far as months after, people still approached me beaming and thanking me. They’d want an autograph or picture with me and I would happily oblige, simply being amazed that they had asked in the first place! People remember you for years to come after you host the event that made Mystery Island infamous.

All Grand Bogens plan the festivity differently and will, naturally, behave how they please and how they believe will most benefit the guests Those are simply a few tips of Grand Bogen etiquette that most prefer to abide by. If you are a Grand Bogen in training, feel free to arrange the party however you want! Be wild and crazy with your organization of the festival. Don’t feel tense and up tight! Simply let loose and plan to your fancy. But be sure to plan around those tips so that the fruits remained pleased. After all, without the fruits, there would be no Gadgadsbogen!

This brings me to the sorrowful end of my article. I hope I have informed you as much as possible on the privilege it is to become Grand Bogen. I also trust you’ll consider becoming a nominee for the position after you have heard what a wonderful practice it is. So, needless to say, keep your eyes open while visiting or living in Mystery Island. For you never know when the island Elders will be lurking behind a tree and watching you. It sounds creepy, I know. But if they find potential in you, they will inform you that they are interested in making YOU the next star.

 
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