FAERIE CITY - This afternoon, on the 30th Day of Hiding, the Faerie Queen made
a statement to Faerieland.
In her speech, she proclaimed that the faeries were fed up with Balthazar and
his mischievous ways. While the bottling and selling of faeries is considered
a capital offence, there is still another reason that the faeries wish to put
in end to the reign of Balthazar--he has begun to snack on PetPets! The Faerie
Queen herself is presently meeting with the President of the PetPet Protectors
Team. The PPPT is co-operating with the Faerie Special Forces (FSF) to establish
peace for all faeries and petpets in Neopia. Only one course of action seems
possible.
The Faeries will bottle Balthazar.
After years of being captured, bottled, and sold, the Faerieland community
has had enough. The PetPet munching incident in the new game, Extreme Herder,
was the last straw. In the Faerie Queen's own words, "Balthazar is to be bottled
at all costs."
The plan is simple. A squad of well-trained Battle Faeries will hide in waiting
in the dense areas of forest Balthazar hunts in. A petpet will be placed in
the area as bait. When Balthazar appears, the faeries will leap in and immediately
use a Downsize Plus on him, so he will fit into the bottle. They will then proceed
to cork the bottle and bring him to Faerieland to stand trial for the Bottling
of Faeries and Eating
of PetPets. He is expected to serve several weeks in the Faerie Caves
as punishment.
We went to a press conference to bring you the latest news on the issue:
Reporter: Mrs. Faerie Queen, do you have any comments on your intended
actions against Balthazar?
Faerie Queen: Why, of course! We plan to bottle him! Every type of Faerie
will take part in the action, from Fire to Dark.
Reporter: But isn't it true that there will be negative effects on Neopia
if this plan is carried out?
Faerie Queen: We understand that Balthazar's stock will probably crash,
and there will be a large spike in the PetPet population. Some things, however,
must be done.
Reporter: Thank you for your time, Mrs. Faerie Queen.
So, Darkness Faeries will be in on the plan as well! What does Jhudora have
to say about this?
Reporter: Jhudora? Could we have a moment of your time?
Jhudora: Of course! I simply LOVE being in The Neopian Times!
Reporter: Jhudora, are you going to take part in the... um... scheme
against Balthazar?
Jhudora: Yes, I will help to bottle him. But believe me, if I find him
first, he will be sorry! Some of my Dark Faerie sisters have been bottled. They
say that life in a bottle is extremely boring.
Reporter: Just what would you do to Balthazar?
Jhudora: Turn him into a Mortog,
of course.
Reporter: That doesn't sound too bad.
Jhudora: Oh, it gets worse. After I make him a Mortog, I'll give him
to the Kiss the Mortog Grundo. He'll be forced to kiss thousands of Neopets!
Reporter: How cruel! Hey... wait a minute... have you ever turned anyone
else into a Mortog?
Jhudora: Um... no! No, that's it! No!
Reporter: What ever happened to Dr. Sloth, anyway? And your chronically
annoying little sister?
Jhudora: What little sister? Uh... hey... look at the time! I really
ought to be going! Later!
So, it seems that whenever your pet kisses a Mortog, it may be kissing an
evil ruler of the galaxy, or a dark faerie. How intriguing. It seems we have
uncovered yet another great conspiracy! But letıs get back on track. Are the
faeries REALLY going to carry through with their plans to bottle Balthazar?
Surely not every Neopian would want to see such a famous character in a bottle.
Why, the powerful pets who bought their way to fame by getting faeries from
Balthazar would probably hate to see him put away. This could bring up a pretty
controversial question--is it the faeries' right to put this beast in a bottle?
Surely this is a matter of opinion.
But remember, next time you play Kiss the Mortog, you might not be kissing
just who you think you are.... | 
