THADE'S MANSION - Hello, this is Neopia's own headcase, Spirit_wolf72. Out of
curiosity, I decided to go interview the master of anagrams, Eliv Thade. We're
outside of Thade's mansion now. Hey, I wonder what that sign's for? It says, 'Eb
Lefaruc!' That is so weird.... *thump* ow ow OW! What's this pit of spikes doing
here? Eliv should warn a person about things like this! After much pain and bandages,
we are now actually inside Thade's mansion, and hopefully there will be no more
unannounced spike pits here.... *falls into unannounced spike pit*
Now we are finally talking to Mr. Thade. Well, Mr. Thade, first of all, what
made you decide to become an evil maniac?
Thade: Ti snatw ym icoehc! I asw cofder!
Me: I beg your pardon?
Thade: Excuse me. I usually talk in anagrams.
Me [muttering]: That would explain the sign...
Thade: I'll thank you not to interrupt me! I said, It wasn't my choice
to become a maniac! I was forced.
Me: Is that so? How were you forced?
Thade: Well, a certain servant of mine decided to go and be all smart-alecky
and make a word puzzle that even I, the great Eliv Thade, could not solve!
Me [muttering again]: Quite full of yourself, aren't you?
Thade: *whacks me upside the head*
Me: Okay, okay, enough with the questions for now. How about a tour
of the mansion?
Thade [looking gleeful for some reason]: Gladly. For some reason, I
found myself being shown the dungeons, and now I'm in a cell. Oh, joy.
After spending a good few hours in a dark cell, I managed to pick the lock
with a piece of celery I happened to have in my pocket. Marching up the stairs
[and tripping on my way over a stray skeleton], I went to confront Thade.
Me: How dare you lock me in a cell in your dungeon!
Thade: I nodt sendanurtd a rowd rouey ginasy. I anc ynol peska ni margnaas.
Me: Don't give me that anagram stuff, mister! I know you can talk!
Thade: Well, if you don't like it, why don't you just
******************************* THIS ARTICLE HAS BEEN DEEMED INAPPROPRIATE
BY THE NEOPETS TEAM. GO READ SOMETHING ELSE. WELL, GO ON, WE'RE WAITING. *******************************
Sorry about that. I'll skip the part where Thade and I had a little exchange
of opinions, and go to the part where we finally stopped punching eacho-- er,
resumed the interview.
Me [holding an icepack over one eye]: So, Mr. Thade, how about you
explain a typical day in your maniacal life for us?
Thade [lying flat on the floor]: Well, I wake up early in the morning.
After waking up, I tuck my Rainbow Meekins, Babykins, back in, because little
Baby-Waby likes to sleep later than me -- forget I ever told you that.
Me [eagerly scribbling down every word in my Fire Faerie notebook]:
Yes sir. Thade: So anyway, I wake up and I get right to my evil planning. But
every good evil spectre needs a healthy breakfast to get him going, so I first
sit down and have a nice breakfast of Baby Food and Cookies... wait, no, erase
Me [doing no such thing]: Of course.
Thade: Well, after my breakfast of Fantastic Fly Pie, Asparagus Yoghurt,
and other gross foods, I go to start work on my evil plans. Actually, usually
I don't do work on evil plans every day. I mostly read, to keep up my amazing
Me: What is your favorite book?
Thade: Sad Peophin Tales. I cry every time I read it... the stories
are so sad! *starts to sob*
Thade [regaining composure]: Forget that I ever did that. My favorite
book is The Radioactive Pteri Part I. I use it to learn how to make evil radioactive
minions, in case the need arises.
Me [shutting notebook and standing up]: Well, thank you Mr. Thade,
I daresay that Neopians everywhere will enjoy hearing about the real Eliv Thade.
Now if you'll excuse me, I must be going now.
Well, now all you Neopians know the true Eliv Thade. He's not evil at all,
he's just a big softie who cries at sad stories and loves his Meekins to pieces.
Now if you'll excuse me, I believe that's Thade now, and he has a bit of a bone
to pick with me! *runs off*